thebittersweetromance's Xanga

Perspective

Sat, 07 Feb 2009 14:57:55 GMT

Its amazing how something you can ponder, think and pray on can shift so dramatically and the way you felt completely changes.

Life is tough for an optimist and I think so for two reasons.

1) You always look for the best in people and you don't actually see who they are, you see what they could be. I'm sure you would agree that one of the most frustrating things is placing attributes on someone where they don't actually exist.
2) You only see the best in yourself. I believe, at least for myself, that you focus on the best things about yourself and not what needs to improve. And sometimes, I believe, you attach attributes to yourself that you wish were there.

Can you show me how to get to Sesame Street?

Back to the original thought....
The shift for me was an issue of perspective. When the reality is presented in a certain format you accept it because its all your given. It would be very much like if you were watching Elmo, Big Bird and Kermit on TV. You could only see one angle of the action. For all you knew, that bird, frog and red monster were walking, talking and hugging. Their actions genuine, their movements real.

But if you were given a chance to be on the set and see what was really happening....

You would see it was just a show and what you thought was real, was only an act. But there's no way you would've known unless you were able to change the perspective of what you've seen.

On the flip side, a shift in perspective can you show how incredible someone is and the beauty you've failed to see can be overwhelming.

As I lay sleeping....

Wed, 10 Dec 2008 21:46:24 GMT

Did you ever have a dream that follows you for years?

I have a dream that haunts me and although I keep redreaming it.
I always wake up the same way.

In a panic.

In my dream I am always in college (I graduated about 2 years ago)

Its finals week and I realize that I have a class that I have never gone to. A class that I forgot completely about and now I will fail. I'm running down the hallway in a panic and asking other people if they've seen the professor. My heart is beating out of my chest and I realize Im not going to be able to graduate and walk with my class.

I reach the professors office and there's a sign on the door that says she is gone and no more late work will be accepted. I run to the steno pool and beg for her number. They give it to me and the professor agrees to help me if I can make it to her house before 5.

(The clock always says 4:32.)

I jump in my car and I start driving as fast as I can. Im racing at speeds around 100 miles an hour when I lose control and slam into a ditch, flipping the car.

I crawl out of the car and its almost 5 O'clock. I start limping down the highway and my phone wont call out.

I wake up thinking I have to make it to her house anyway I can.

Does anyone have a reoccurring dream or a dream like this?

Feel free to share.

The first snow...

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 05:17:44 GMT

The flakes fell violently. Plunging their white bodies to the earth with the intensity of a kamikaze pilot. Their sole intent to blanket whatever they struck. Washing the world white. Their suicide granting salvation.

ha ha ha ha English Major Flashback

Ok, it wasnt quite that dramatic. In fact it was depressing.

The reason for such is because I was stuck inside at work. And then it began to snow the very first snow of the season. And I watched from inside my career coffin.

And because I couldn't go outside I made this picture to at least pretend I was outside.

A couple of hours passed and then I actually saw snow sticking to the ground. The very thing the National Weather Service said it would not do. So I couldn't resist anymore and I went to the front of the office and snapped a few photos to commemorate the first snow.

Warning: These photos are not very good. But they do show snow outside an office.

So the first thing I saw was our bench outside.

Yeah...It had snow on it.

And then there was a bush next to the bench with snow on it.

So naturally I was fascinated.

And then I turned around and saw our mini-Christmas tree. Which for some people also doubles as an ash tray.

And this is what that same mini-Christmas tree looks like to my dog.

And then there was a red bush.

And it had a twin.

So all in all this photo extravaganza lasted about 5 minutes and then I had to rush back inside.

And when I did....I found this!

A threatening letter from a DJ who tried to kill me by putting plastic shards in coffee creamer.
But that's another story for another blog.

Like I said just another boring, snowy afternoon at work.

You are...

Fri, 28 Nov 2008 23:04:30 GMT

Ok so this blog is to tell you a little bit about my best friend Nathan Johnson. I met Nathan while going to College of the Ozarks. When I first saw him I knew....he had to be a big fat Jerk.

It turns out my first impressions are not always accurate.

No but seriously Nathan and I became friends and then became best friends. Nathan is basically the kind of friend that is always there, always cares and the encourager you need at your lowest points.

God truly blessed me with an awesome friend.

I was privileged enough to be Nathan's best man when he married the love of his life Jessica.

This a song by Nathan Johnson that encourages all of us to remember who Christ is and no matter where we find ourselves in life to always praise our Father, trust Him and give Him thanks.

If you see this video please drop by Nathan Johnson's facebook and give him some encouragement as well as pray for him and Jess as they continue to pursue God with all of their hearts.

Im willing to bet you can remember a time that Nathan blessed you.

Thots to ponder while on a bench...

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 14:59:37 GMT

In a crowded room

I have determined that people don’t like each other very much. That or they have no desire to widen the circle of existence that they know.

For example:

I sat in a crowded room waiting to be seated at one of the few breakfast joints in Springfield where you can get a salmon omelet. I sat on a bench with room for two more people to sit. And although there were exactly two people standing beside them, neither one of them sat down.

Granted I didn’t invite them to sit down but its not like I planted a flag that said this bench is claimed in the name of Josh.

Now here is an interesting thing to ponder. I was sitting on the far left of the bench leaving ample room for anyone who wanted to sit and people felt it was either improper for them to invade my bench bubble or for me to be allowed in theirs.

Imagine if I had simply spread myself out on that bench. I mean just laying out there as comfortable could be as I waited to be taken to a table. I would have been as happy as a clam. But imagine what you would think if you saw a guy sprawled out on a bench by himself as you stood their standing.

What a jerk…who does this guy think he is? I mean here I am standing to wait and he’s just relaxing like a bum on a sidewalk. Why doesn’t he sit to the far left so others can sit down and wait.

We as people are a very odd and twisted thing.

Ive been reading Donald Miller’s Searching for God Knows What and in chapter 2 of the book, the same book I was reading while on the bench, that the fear of intimacy with others in our generation is the very thing that can damage or limit our relationship with God.

Imagine…if you wouldn’t sit next to a perfectly harmless guy on a bench because you don’t want him to enter your bubble; how much are you really letting God into your bench bubble.

Think about that the next time your sitting, or laying down, on a public bench.

More Than I Deserve: Meeting Third Day

Sun, 23 Nov 2008 17:31:14 GMT

Now I understand that for some that's not a very big deal...but for me it was. You see, Third Day to me represents Christian music done right. When I was a little kid I thought music had to sound a certain way. I thought it had to either be Southern Gospel or old, old songs you sang in church. My father had tons of rock records which I loved. So I grew up thinking there was good music and then there was Christian music.

Three bands changed the way I viewed music; DC Talk, Jars of Clay and Third Day. I found that Christian music wasn't just something you sang in church because you had to or you were supposed to. It could rock and be enjoyable.

That was about 10 years ago.

The first actual song I "learned" on the guitar was a Third Day song called (More Than) I Deserve? Its also my favorite song that they have ever done. So as you can imagine Mac Powell, the lead singer, is kind of a hero in my mind.

But the way I met Mac Powell wasn't because of any connections I have in radio. It was just little blessings from God that are amazing.

This would be my ticket that I got for free. I was at church and someone asked me if I was going to see Third Day. I said I was waiting for someone to give me a free ticket. (That was directed at my friend who works at a radio station) And I guy I had just started to get to know reached into his wallet and pulled out this ticket and said his friend couldn't go. (Thanks Jeremy!)

Well I got to the concert and listened to needtobreathe and revive and both put on a great show. While I went to the lobby to grab some fresh air I saw someone I work with and they asked me If I'd like to meet Third Day!

I think I mumbled excitedly and just nodded my head. That's when they slapped one of these on my chest.

And yes the Tulsa shirt is awesome.

So they rushed us back into a room so the guys from Third Day could meet us before they took the stage. And I started frantically searching for something to have them sign and wishing I had a camera with me. But luckily I still had my ticket and my cell phone.

So I finally got to meet Mac face to face and he is a really nice guy. I told him thank you for so many years of making great Christian music. And then I told him my favorite song of theirs was I Deserve? And then he sang a few bars of the chorus and told me it had been forever since they had done that one. Now I really wish I could've gotten that on tape because it was awesome. But I did capture this when he turned around to talk to me again.

So I gotta say all the guys from Third Day were incredibly nice and genuine. And for guys to still be that humble after being on the road for 16 years deserve recognition for all they have done for Christian music.

Thank you God for blessing me in so many small ways every single day. Help me to recognize them more often because theyre certainly more than I deserve.

What you don't know about Senator John McCain

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 18:27:16 GMT

Now while I realize that the elections are over, said and done; I thought it would be nice to share this.

I will say I picked a grand time to become a reporter, right on the eve of the Presidential election. This allowed me to meet people that I otherwise would have only seen on CNN or Fox News.

One of the gentlemen I got to meet on the campaign trail was an incredible man named Charlie Plumb. Now that name might not mean very much to you but it meant a lot to the Arizona Senator who goes by the name of John McCain.

Retired Navy captain Charlie Plumb spent more than five years in a North Vietnamese prison with Senator McCain.

Now while many of you are all to aware of John McCain's service to his country, I doubt to many are aware of the sacrifices he made as a P.O.W. I recognize that some didn't support McCain in the election but that cannot take away from the character and leadership he showed in the face of death while being held prisoner by the Vietcong.

Here is Charlie Plumb's account of what happened in that camp.

It was my privilege to meet and interview Mr. Plumb when he came to Springfield, Mo. He was a very kind man with a very resilient spirit.

Go Magazine: Springfield's Top Single

Wed, 19 Nov 2008 22:23:42 GMT

Click My Goofy Photo To See What Go Magazine has on me.

Well I wanted to thank everyone for voting for me to be one of Springfield's Top Single. I guess this proves beyond a doubt that I am one of the most single men in Springfield. Few people are more single than me

No but seriously it has been an interesting ride. When I was first nominated I had to submit an interview to Go Magazine. The problem was that I was on two types of pain killers. So naturally I was a lil bit loopy.

You can actually click here to see it and my work photo they had to use because I couldn't come in.

My goal was to try and glorify Christ through this experience. I know that might sound silly but Ill be honest with you I was not looking forward to the photo shoot. God had been dealing with a lot about how much image controls my life. I want my identity to be in Him.

So my hope is maybe folks will see my lil profile deal and see that life is more than just pursuing relationships with one another.

The most important relationship we can have is with Christ.

My Own Limitations

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 04:40:34 GMT

Man that really sounds like the title of an episode of Scrubs.

Hardcore Scrubs fans will know what I'm talking about.

No; but tonight was a humbling experience. I ran for the first time since I had skin graft surgery to my right leg.

I haven't ran in about two months so lets just say I was exhausted by the time I was done.

I made a goal to run for 30 minutes which I will happily say I did accomplish. The humbling experience would be the distance I covered in half an hour

1.65 miles

You see I was down to running about 6 and 1/2 minute miles. Which for a guy my size was pretty great. I was conditioning to be able to run a half marathon. So I guess you could call this a major set back.

One of the main issues is I know that I'm not supposed to be running as fast I used to so I didn't try that. Right now its the delicate balance of retraining and recognizing and operating within my own limitations. I have to do a number of things to make sure that I don't cause my skin graft to reject. That includes diet, sleeping and other preventive medical measures.

I will say God is teaching me patience. And I know this one race that has to be paced out in order to win.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:

3.... And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;

God please help me to see the purpose and recognize Your timing.

miles to go before I sleep

Sat, 15 Nov 2008 15:18:13 GMT

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening

Now while I'm neither;

a) Stopping
b) By the woods
c) On a Snowy Evening

I was thinking of this poem this morning on my way into work. Now if you're asking. What poem? Then I would have to refer you to click on this to see one of my favorite Robert Frost's poems.

Anydangway

One reason I was thinking of this particular work is because it was the first snow I had seen this season. Now it wasn't quite the downy flakes we hear of from Mr. Frost but it was just a very light and scattered dusting that once it hit your windshield melted in an instant. I think if I had seen a kid outside trying to catch one on his tongue I would have honestly given him 5 dollars for his sheer determination.

But no, more than likely it's the very last lines of the poem.

But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.

Which I think is my feeling for the day as I write and read the news.

Miles to go before I sleep